Dear Cupid
by novusluna
Summary: Next time, hit us both... Miracle/Partner one-sided/unrequited love


**A/N: Because one-sided love doesn't always have to end tragically sad.**

 **Enj- _oh, wait!_ I didn't include all the pairings and characters because I despise seemingly endless tags and do unto others, amiright? The pairings are basically Miracle/Partner, except for Akashi Seijuurou because he's a special snowflake.**

 **Now onwards to the fic~ Enjoyyy!**

* * *

See, the thing was, Takao wasn't planning on confessing his undying love to their resident ace-sama. It didn't exactly take hawk eyes to indicate Midorima's lack of interest in personal relations of any kind, let alone any romantic ventures. And Takao still had those moments where he wonders if whatever it was they had between them (friendship? partnership? master-servant eternal servitude?) was all one grand delusion in a reality where Midorima just barely tolerates him.

The moments only last a few seconds before Midorima says something so incredibly textbook _tsundere_ that Takao can't help but laugh and laugh, then take a deep breath and laugh some more, and for all Midorima's outrage at being laughed at, Takao's hawk eyes spy the smallest of twitches in the corner of his lips.

But love and Midorima in the same sentence ? Ha. Hahahahaha.

So Takao doesn't waste anytime daydreaming about all the perfect confessing scenarios, and is quite content to go through his highschool life being the close confidante of his crush.

Yeah, he's always known he was a masochist.

So his confession was, for lack of a better word, an accident.

"Shin-chan, you like Oha-Asa right?"

" _Like_ is too imprudent a word" Taka stifles his giggles. _Of course it is._

"Oha Asa is the tool I make use of to better myself and do everything I can to achieve my goals. It's hardly a matter of _like_ " He talked as if the word itself personally offended him.

"What about red bean soup, you like that right?"

"No"

"What do you mean 'no'? You drink it three times a day!" Takao insisted, determined to get more of an answer out of his partner.

"It's nutritional value is simply optimal for my health and physical fitness requirements"

"Do you like _anything_?" Takao pressed. Little did he know, his subconscious meant any _one_.

"I don't see the point of such an unreliable, flimsy way of categorizing things"

"Hey, it's not flimsy, my feelings for you are _strong_ okay"

Midorima freezes. And Takao looks at him, replays the last 30 seconds in his head, and prays to the higher power Midorima believes in to grant him a quick and merciful death, because he couldn't for the life of him think of a joke to cover this one up.

"I… like you, Shin-chan" Because if he was going to die, might as well die with no regrets. "I really, _really_ like you"

His death may be worth it, to see how very red Midorima is.

"…I have no interest in you in _that_ way whatsoever" It's what Takao expected, but still, **_ouch_**. His daydreams had consisted of the various ways Midorima would reject him, including yes, being painfully straightforward. But apparently reality stings a lot more than he expected.

Midorima is less socially oblivious than when he first joined, so he notices Takao's real wince before his comically overdramatic palm to heart falling to the ground in despair.

"I may be asking too much but.. if possible, I'd like us to continue as we were. As friends?" He says the word as if it's some foreign language he's testing out-and dear god, Shin-chan is so cute, too cute! It wasn't fair, dammit! "If you like, that is"

And just how could Takao refuse such a tsundere request like that?

"Shin-chan" For all his teasing, he's always gentle with Shin-chan. His precious, precious, oh-so-fragile Shin-chan. "Don't worry, I'll be by your side forever even after you're sick to death of me and begging me to please just leave"

Midorima harrumphs and glares holes in his can of red bean soup and probably silently curses Oha-Asa for not giving him a clear cut warning about this.

* * *

It was humiliating enough to have fallen for his underclassman. Without said underclassman trying to use it as an excuse to get out of chores and get in more solo gym time.

"Kasamatsu-senpai" The idiot would pout, batting his eyelashes, looking disgustingly pretty. "Don't you love me?"

"Less and less every minute" Kasamatsu would lie and kick him. His kicks were getting softer too, Kise must've noticed. No wonder he'd been acting out more lately.

"But senpaiiii" Whining was not attractive, but Kise as always manages to be the exception to every rule "I only want the court for 1 hour, please, please, pretty please? I'll give you my latest photobook"

"Who the hell'd want that piece of junk!?" Kasamatsu wants it. In fact, he already owns it

But Kasamatsu never had any intention of even acknowledging his feelings let alone tell Kise. He had more important things to worry about like basketball, and basketball and senior final exams.

There was also a tiny part of his brain worrying, worrying and worrying some more about things not being the same between him and Kise anymore; that he couldn't pat him on the back or mess up his annoyingly soft hair or treat him to cheap convenience store _onigiri_ ever again.

"Sennn-paiiiii, the court" Kise insisted, getting dangerously closer and closer. Kasamatsu instinctively reached out and pushed his face away.

"So mean, senpai, don't you love me?" His underclassmen sniffed dolefully.

 _That_ again. It bothered him, not that the fact that his feelings were never going to be returned and it's not exactly like Kise was rubbing that in his face. The idiot was just oblivious as hell. It was frustrating dammit!

Because if he were to write down his love story- _which he wouldn't because he was a freakin' basketball player!_ \- it would be about a moth and a light. The moth is attracted to the light, the light returns the attraction as much as an inanimate object with the sentience of a light bulb could manage, and the moth dies a tragically premature death. The End.

"Senpai, senpai, senpai, senpai" Kise chanted in his ear, admittedly more hypnotizing than it was annoying.

Kasamatsu shivered. This was bad. He didn't want to do anything he'd regret later.

"Senpai, am I not your favorite?" Kise went on, still blissfully unaware of what he was doing, so innocently playful.

…Kasamatsu was a bad friend, terrible senpai and worse captain for really, _really_ wanting to kiss Kise just to make him shut up.

"Senpaaaaaaa-"

"Fine, you win, you get the damn court!" Kasamatsu yelled out, already planning out how many laps he can make Kise run until he passes out. However his brain abruptly stopped running calculations and his mind blanked out when Kise leaned forward and pecked him lightly on the cheek.

"What… was that?" Kasamatsu's hand dragged over the spot Kise's lips had touched.

"A thank you kiss"

He deserved the kick.

* * *

The rooftop was a scary place.

"Aomine-san?"

And not just because it was very high up. Sakurai Reo mentally apologized to his family if he fell to his death. It would be inconvenient to the school as well so he sent another mental apology. Oh, and the team would need to replace his position as a shooting guard, not that he's very useful as one. Sorry for not being useful to the team, maybe it's better if he did fall to his death-

"Reoooo… Go away.. you're ruining the mood" Aomine barely spared him a glance, too busy nose deep in one of his magazines that makes Sakurai blush just by the cover.

"I'm so sorry, but I have something very important to tell you"

Aomine yawned and scratched his head.

"I've wanted to tell this to you for a long time, but it's never the right time. And I can never quite get the courage to say the words I've held deep, deep within me, but I'll say it right now…"

Aomine looks up from his magazine and holds it up comparing whoever's in it to Reo, just as he was preparing to all but scream 'PLEASE COME TO PRACTISE' in Aomine's face, followed by an a series of apologies of course but…

"Come back when you grow a pair of boobs"

"Yes! I'm so sorry! I'll do my best! Sorry!" The rooftop was indeed, without a doubt, a terrifying place.

 _'I'm so sorry, Aomine-san won't come down from the roof until I grow a pair of female mammary glands, I tried my best but sorry, so sorry'_ , he later reports to his bewildered captain, and livid vice-captain.

* * *

"Here you go, Atsushi" Himuro Tatsuya smiles and pushes another _Umaibo_ into Murasakibara's abnormally large hands, which he readily accepts. Himuro would be flattered if he didn't know that Murasakibara would accept candy from strangers if the team didn't keep a close enough eye on him.

"Say, Atsushi, what do you think about getting your lover to cook for you" His cooking skills weren't as good as his little brother's of course, but Himuro would try his best. In cooking and in his other set of skills as well.

"Lover?"

"Yes, the person you love the most and want to spend the rest of your life with"

"I only love snacks" Atsushi says and that was the end of that confession route. Himuro sighs lightly and wonders if his brother was having any luck convincing _his_ basketball partner to be his life partner.

* * *

"Hey Kuroko, you want a vanilla burger?"

Kuroko blinked at his new light.

"…I wasn't aware they made those"

"No, shit, I-I meant" Kagami cleared his throat and started again "Do..would you like a cheeseshake…no, wait I mean…"

Kuroko waited patiently.

"Va-ni-lla sha-ke?" Kagami painstakingly emphasized each syllable. "Want one?

"Yes, please" Kuroko was unsurprisingly adaptable to any kind of situation "Two if possible"

Kagami severely underestimated what nerves would do to his normally monstrous appetite. And he found himself staring at a stack of burgers he had ordered, his bathroom mirror-practiced confession running through his head in a non-stop loop.

The beat down clock in the wall ticked seconds, and soon minutes passed by with Kagami very much _not_ confessing to Kuroko.

"Kagami-kun, I'm almost finished" And so he was, nibbling the straw and looking up with those wide blue eyes of pure innocence.

"Ri-right" Kagami stuttered. _Remember how you did it in front of the mirror_ , he instructed himself silently.

"So if your motive was to confess to me here today, you're running out of time" Kuroko tilts his shake to get the last drops "Please make it quick, I need to get home"

His shadow might as well have punched him in the gut with an ignite pass.

 _"You…You knew?"_ He choked out.

"It's been happening to almost all of my former teammates" Kuroko's expression is as vacant as ever "And you weren't being subtle Kagami-kun, going to our senpai for love advice"

"They told you!?" Seniority be damned, Kagami will strangle them.

"No, I was there the entire time"

Now Kagami wanted to strangle himself.

 _Slurp. Slurrrrrp._

"…Kagami-kun, I'm done"

"Okay, let's get out of here then" Images of giant meteors hitting the planet and sink holes opening up beneath him were all such nice fantasies.

"…Aren't you forgetting something, Kagami-kun?"

"Like hell am I confessing to you now!" Kagami should be more heartbroken, should be writing poetry about unrequited love and broken friendships in his head. But with how _normal_ Kuroko was handling everything, like nothing was awkward between them at all, like nothing was broken, Kagami mostly felt relief.

"…I meant your cheeseburgers. Aren't you going to finish them?"

"Wha-I, no" Kagami stared at the pile of burgers. The burgers stared back at him accusingly.

"Kagami-kun, you shouldn't waste food" Kuroko's face was just as disapproving. So Kagami started to gather up the burgers into doggy bags.

"..ve you…" Kagami mumbled, the temperature of his face suddenly skyrocketing. He pressed his knuckles against his cheeks, yeah definitely burning hot.

"Excuse me? I didn't quite catch that so if you can repea-"

"I LOVE YOU" He screams in the middle of Maji Burger, holding half a pound of burgers, blushing like an awkward schoolgirl. "I mean, you already know and it's not like I wanted to tell you again because you _know_ and this is not at all how I planned it to go, I had this whole romantic speech prepared and-"

"Kagami-kun" And that's all it took to stop Kagami from rambling himself into a deeper and deeper hole. Kuroko took a long sip of his milkshake. "I know. I heard you confessing your undying devotion to the bathroom mirror between classes"

 _Of course_ he did. Of freakin' course!

"I'm happy to hear about your feelings for me. Thank you for telling me, but I'm afraid I can't return them. I'm sorry" He bowed.

"Oh…don't, don't apologize" Kagami says, he already knew the answer, but can't quite stop himself from asking "Is it because you're in love with…?" _them? one of them? any of them? all?_

"Basketball, yes" Kuroko replies quite seriously, and Kagami is reminded of just why he fell in love with Kuroko in the first place.

* * *

There's 3 of them at Rakuzan and the source of their romantic fantasies only takes 7 seconds to deal with them.

"I love all of humanity equally" Akashi smiles benevolently down at them, a godly light illuminating him from behind. And Mibuchi, Hayama, Nebuya walks right into the light, and are never seen or heard from again.

Behind the Rakuzan high basketball club dumpster, Furihata Kouki sat frozen with his handwritten confession letter between his knees and decided he preferred living in the shadows, _especially the 'living' part_ , thank you very much.

 _~Owari (no seraph?)_

* * *

 **A/N: Hope you had fun reading this because I know I had fun writing this… because apparently I'm a masochist *shrugs***

 **I wrote a whole big paragraph of sentimental shit here and deleted it all but basically a platonic relationship isn't worth any less than a romantic one~**

 **Please leave a word or two (or a couple hundred! :P) telling me what you think... I'd really appreciate it :)))**


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